Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
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