Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?
Because you touch yourself at night.
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize
