What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Randomize
