I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
It's shark week go big or go home
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
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