she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
You peed on a flamingo?!?
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