the stripper made me go home becuz she had to take her kid to a birthday party in the morning
My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
I forgot how hot balto sounded
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
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