i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Randomize
