Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
Randomize
