she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
So they're giving me a CT scan because I probably have a hernia. From getting a BJ from you. Really. This may be a pivotal moment in my decision to write a book about my life
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
You know what's awkward? Being with your girlfriend and seeing her ex-boyfriend that she left for you while you've got a Ron Burgundy level awkward boner.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
Randomize
