she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
Randomize
