Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
Randomize