Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
All I wanted to do was come home from work and masturbate for national sex day... I sliced my the tip of finger giving myself a pedicure so I can’t even do that #singlelife
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
Randomize
