everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
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