We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
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