Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
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