Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
Are my feet made of real feet?
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
I recorded his orgasm, set it as his ringtone, and called him while they were singing happy birthday to his mom. Yeah, revenge is sweet.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
I promise not to pretend to be Jesus and take the wheel. But to my credit you shouldn't be saying that while I'm that drunk and we are in a car.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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