We're like a lot better than the average bears
I wanna passion pit in your ass
Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
Randomize