If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
omg how embarrassing to not hear the delivery person knocking because you're singing "where are you Pizza" to the tune of "where are you christmas" too loudly
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
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