Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Randomize
