Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
Randomize
