ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
be right there i have to get my cape
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
Randomize
