i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
God gave him joint rollers for hands
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
Randomize
