why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
Randomize
