then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
