I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
the bastard is cheating on me with some sleazy barista from Starbucks
That’s his wife they’re back together
You say potato, I say sleazy barista
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