morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
