I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Randomize
