discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
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