Skipping work because i'm still too drunk from last night still. got home at midnight and passed out in front of my door for 2 hours bc i couldn't find my key
had to call my rooommate to let us in. Passed out in my dress and found the key on my hair tie-in my hair- just now.
If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Randomize
