I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
Why are my keys in the refrigerator?
You said "This is gonna really confuse me tomorrow." Apparently drunk you plays pranks on hungover you.
This explains so much.
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
Randomize
