You're going to have to start masturbating with your left hand. Or with someone's vagina
i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
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