We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
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