i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
My dad is sitting where you rode me
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