I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
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