I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
Randomize
