Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
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