Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
how can u be prego again
my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
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