i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
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