You can't motorboat a personality
I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
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