it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
Randomize
