I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Randomize
