the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
No one will ever find true happiness until they have gotten stoned and taken off the bra they've been wearing all day.
You, my dear friend, are a poet of the deep mental longings of women worldwide.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
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