It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
Randomize
