This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
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