my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
Heard at work: Get out of my face before I cuntpunch you so hard your granddaughters have miscarriages. I love my job.
I'm moving there. Get me hired.
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
Randomize
