i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
are you so shy because you have an std?
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
Randomize
