it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
Randomize
