Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
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