i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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