I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
So i just got diagnosed with swine flu. im at walgreens looking like shit and this guy keeps staring at me. Im so gonna cough in his face.
well, dont
I didnt. i just coughed then looked at him menacingly. he got it.
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
He jacked off on my pillow when he found out I left. It was like coming home and finding that your dog, with separation anxiety, had pooped in your shoes. I think I'm flattered...
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
